NirvanaFunClub

I do this thing, I have a showering order.
The order of execution of the actions while I am taking a shower.
I am not exactly sure when I have come up with it. I vaguely remember my mom handing me the responsibility of showering myself at one point during my childhood. I do not remember I have asked for it, but I know it was a special feeling. Very similar to when I saw her change the bed sheets, or simply shaking out a really big blanket. I tried so hard, but my little fingers just couldn’t do it. When I have first managed to do it myself I knew I needed bigger dreams. Now I have to do it by myself all the time.

Showering was different. She handed over the responsibility and didn’t say anything. There were no instructions, so I kind of stumbled around the shower until I came up with the order. It was fixed pretty early on. I haven’t changed it or questioned it since. I have added some steps as I grew older. As the standards for the preparation of my body in this ablism society grew higher. But the order remained.

From up to bottom.

You can imagine how shocked and panicked I was when the other day I forgot a step. I have skipped it. What? Did I really? I was tracing back my actions, and indeed, I HAVE MISSED A STEP!

Am I really that addle-headed I FORGOT THE SHOWER STEP?! And I am not even hungover. What the, why?!

I think I should stop with the medications. There are some things I just cannot accept. Some lines a human being just cannot cross and stay the same. What are we doing people? No. Hard pass. Some things are fixed, finished, relied upon. I need to have at least some sacred things I am not questioning. Those are not up for grabs. I am appalled. This was while.

I stand by my shower routine!

Freedom for my shower routine!

Haters go home!

(Fun fact: When someone ask you what you’re doing and you say ‘I am showering’ they immediately imagine you naked, under the shower;)